I Train Alone

Faced with a void of original thought, people seek the quotes of others to add authority, intelligence, comedy and reverence to their musings. John Bartlett made a familiar fortune this way. The only original quote I can find from him though is, "I have gathered a posie of other men's flowers, and nothing but the thread that binds them is mine own.” It lacks mellifluousness.

Borrowing quotes to bolster your ideas is akin to doing cover tunes. Don't take my word for it though, listen to Celine Dion singing AC/DC's "You Shook Me All Night Long." This should be enough to start a petition to outlaw such activities. I'm printing up the "IMPEACH DION" bumper stickers later this week.

Maybe I'll make my fortune and rewrite Ol' Papa's The Old Man and the Sea, Puccini's Madame Butterfly and Miller's Death of a Salesman. In my versions Santiago gets the monster fish to shore unscathed, Lt. Pinkerton comes back sans new wife for Madame Butterfly AND their son and Willy Loman doesn't commit suicide. For any book signings whose name would I scribble?

Since this is supposed to be an endurance-themed blog and this morning I'm searching for any original thought over a chasm, I'll take the easy way out. To bolster the fact that I normally take the easy way out I'll quote Julie Corey. You know her, she had the audacity to write in my 1985 Yearbook, The Beaverian (we were the Beaver River Beavers!), "I'll never forget you, the guy who always took the easy way out AND got away with it," the chiding continued, "I know you've got a lot of potential in life but whether you use it or not is entirely up to you!" Even though I'm hoping she is a janitor at a circus I have dedicated my 2009 Ironman Canada race and training to her. Perhaps I'll affix that quote to the top tube of my bike and read it when I'm in my box of pain. I'll probably just sit up though.

"And let us run with patient endurance the race that lies before us," is the quote from the Bible, yeah that one, from Hebrews Chapter 12 verse one. I suppose it adds some spirituality to our endeavors and gives us explicit approval from an authority figure to go train.

"Yeah, God's got me doing some cruise intervals today and then tomorrow He's got me doing 10X100's in the pool on the 1:20. What have I done to incur His wrath? How about a recovery week big guy?" Truly He would be God's gift to coaching.

William Shakespeare seems to endorse some judicious use of speedwork in King Henry VIII, "We may outrun, By violent swiftness, that which we run at, And lose by over-running." What is in a name? That which we call a disc wheel by any other name would ride as sweet. That sound you hear is the Bard doing a flamenco dance in his grave.

Twain must've been a triathlete. That is to say he wasn't a solid bike-handler, "Get a bicycle. You will not regret it. If you live."

With all apologies to George Thorogood which of course extend to the Destroyers, nee the Delaware Destroyers, I train alone...not exactly happily, because isn't George really pouting here? He wishes to drink with someone as I usually wish to be training with someone so I've bastardized his song to fill the lack of original thought...sorry:

I train alone, yeah, with nobody else. I train alone, yeah, with nobody else. Yeah, you know when I train alone, I prefer to be by myself.

Now, every morning, just before breakfast, I don't want no coffee or tea. Just me and my good Accelerade. That's all I ever need. Cause I train alone, yeah, with nobody else. I train alone, yeah, with nobody else. Yeah, you know when I train alone, I prefer to be by myself.

Now, the other night I lay sleeping, and I woke from a terrible dream. So I called up my running coach, Jack Daniels, And his partner Steven Pre. And we trained alone, yeah, with nobody else. We trained alone, yeah, with nobody else. Yeah, you know when I train alone, I prefer to be by myself.

Well, the other night I got invited to a party, but I stayed on my trainer instead. Just me and my pal Computrainer, and his brothers FDJ. And we trained alone, yeah, with nobody else. We trained alone, yeah, with nobody else. Yeah, you know when I train alone, I prefer to be by myself.

Well, my whole training group done give up on me, and it makes me feel so bad. The only one who'll hang out with me Is my dear old Yellow Lab. And we trained alone, yeah, with nobody else. We trained alone, yeah, with nobody else. Yeah, you know when I train alone, I prefer to be by myself.

Thanks to Kevin Walter for training with me yesterday and for Kitima for training with me today.